It's Ranting Time!

Friendship is all about respect, trust, honesty and openness. But suddenly I feel like I'm not getting all those from this particular lot of people which one of them used to be my confidant. They are so fucked up right now. Almost all the Indonesian students here in my uni used to be so friendly to each other and we always go together as one whole group. But suddenly some people decided to make a group inside a group. Lately they've been going out together and have been very secretive about it.


WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON WITH YOU GUYS??? Since when you guys decided to behave like high-school students? Pre-teens even? Are you guys scared that we would get in your way? Grow up, people! You're supposed to act like adults by now!


And I guess it's safe to say now, that there's something horribly wrong with you guys. News flash: I'm not the only one who's pissed off with you guys. A whole bunch of people noticed that there has been a slight, no, a HUMONGOUS change of attitude from you guys. First you act like you don't know us, then you ditch us like we're a bag of scum. What did we do to deserve this? Have we ever treated you like fucking rubbish? Did we ever hurt your fucking feelings? Oh, wait. I just remember. You don't have any!


To 'H':


I am so fucking mad at you dude. I felt and still feel really disrespected by you. That day I told you nicely that we have a meeting TODAY at 5. You told me that you probably can't come since you've got replacement class. Hey. I'm not stupid okay. This is the fucking first week of school. Why the fuck should any lecturers replace any lectures, I bet the lecturers are too bored to lecture anyway. Ok, so maybe there is a fucking replacement class. But still, I am not that inferior. I know that replacement classes won't go up til late in the afternoon. And why the fuck did you try to stall like that? By asking "Who's coming to the meeting? What's the meeting about? Is it going to be long?" Don't try to sound like you're interested in the matter if you're not anyway! If you've got somewhere to go or something to do then just tell me! Instead when I told you to give a good reason for your absence you just said "Ummm, hehehehe."


And don't even try to deny what I’ve just written above. I've got the chat log still in my computer.


Yesterday I texted you about the meeting. And seconds after my text got delivered, you bumped oh so coincidentally into me in SA. You acted like nothing's happen.


And today. You've got the nerves for telling me that you're going to the airport. Just an hour before the meeting starts. That is so cowardly. You didn't just get me mad, brother. You've got someone else's blood boiling too. You gave us stupid excuses like "Oh we just decided to go to KLIA this afternoon" and in your text you wrote "... I've business finance replacement class on 2.30 to 4.30". And you had the fucking nerves to tell us that you want to fucking resign from your fucking post just like that. And what's the fucking deal with the English, dude? You are fucking Indonesian. And we are Indonesians too. Indonesians talk in Bahasa Indo to each other. Not some other foreign language. I know your English has fucking improved, don't you think I fucking know already?


Please do remember that you always return to us when you have problems. Remember that day we went to KLCC to buy Kiki's birthday present? You were having problems with that housemate of yours. Who were there to listen to your stories? Who were there to give you advice? Who were there to comfort you? To make you feel appreciated? Who were there to ask you to be strong?


I just want you to know, what I wrote on my text was and still is true. I'm still going to treat you as my friend and fellow committee. I don't care what you think about me and I don't care how you're going to treat me. I'm a bitch, face it. But at least I still have some respect for my friends. If I'm going to end up like your two former friends and that Korean guy, I'll take the risk. It’s not my fault to begin with anyway.


*Sorry for the excessive use of the F word.*